Australia, meet your potential new talk show host.
Here at The Vocal, we’re all about giving animals the platform needed to show humans how things should be done. In one of our first published pieces, we argued that pigs would form a better government than the one we have now and we still stand by this declaration today and maybe until the end of time.
Not ones to “hog” the limelight however, it would appear that some other geniuses have uncovered the untapped potential of adorable animals in assuming positions of authority.
Case in point: there is a petition with 500+ signatures appealing to Network Ten directly with the following, fairly reasonable request:
We the undersigned call on Network Ten to terminate Andrew Bolt’s contract and give this cute and engaging platypus his Sunday morning 10am time slot instead.
Why is this important?
Like you even needed to ask but okay, let’s indulge this whimsical questioning.
1. Platypus does not have a court conviction and can be trusted not to abuse its position of power.
2. Platypus will not routinely target Indigenous people, Muslims and other groups for tabloid opinion fodder.
3. Platypus will not presume to know better than 97% of climate scientists on global warming and will not sprout unscientific propaganda.
They finish with this irrefutable point on the fine balance that only a Platypus can strike between adorableness and environmental sustainability:
Rather than continue to give this destructive, unscientific and irresponsible lawbreaker air-time, we would much rather watch this platypus, who apart from being exceedingly cute, will probably be an excellent reminder about the importance of looking after waterways and the environment in general. Lastly, while watching Andrew Bolt could easily lead to a rise in blood pressure, we feel this platypus will have the opposite effect.
The ball is in your court Network Ten. Choose wisely.
